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12 Responses

  1. Duane Arnold says:


    Just like Miss Kitty, you have people praying for you… even when you feel alone.

  2. Michael says:

    Thank you, Duane.
    Missy says thank you, as well… 🙂

  3. Paige says:

    Wow. Amen and amen….. You have guts to publish that line about being “tortured” and abandoned by the One who says He loves…. I’ve had those thoughts as well…. and quickly apologized to The One…

    On top of the terrifying healing adventure to the vet, there is also the sacrificial cost to you behind the scenes that Missy knows nothing about and has no way of paying you back… Imagine the Cost of keeping us as His ‘pets’…. the cost of love.

  4. Michael says:

    Well done, Paige!

  5. Michael says:

    As far as having guts…I have to be as honest as I can be or I’m no good to anyone…we can’t always be honest with each other,but we have to be honest to God…

  6. Babylon's Dread says:

    Living within the charismatic tradition has its’ own special liabilities. One of them is the inability and unwillingness to reckon with suffering as a sacrament rather than an adversary to conquer. It does seem to play out that if you are on that see saw it is very hard to balance. I stay here within this blog community as a corrective to my weighted audience. We so fear that embracing suffering is siding with the devil. I remain unrepentant in my intention to live within the grace of God while seeking his deliverance. I think most believers do just that.

  7. Michael says:


    The doctrine of suffering as a sacrament is one that needs taught constantly.
    I hold to it…and hope for better…

  8. Paige says:

    BD, while not truly a ‘charismatic’ in tradition nor practice, I have my own version of the Leviticus 28 ‘sowing and reaping’ mentality, and have had ALL of my foundational beliefs shattered by how much apparent injustice and ‘undeserved’ suffering God allows in this life. I now, instead, work to fully embrace the concept of “these momentary afflictions are ‘WORKING FOR US’ and exceeding weight of glory”… Rather than resisting, rebuking and “not accepting” extreme loss, suffering, etc, I now view God’s Eternal Economy as the direct opposite of earth’s.

  9. Reuben Mills says:

    Off topic, we have a mother and six kittens about 4 days old we are fostering right now. Mom does not trust us with the kittens much, and moves them to different “safe houses” often enough to keep us on our toes with where to place her food bowl and litter box.

    On topic, I totally get “…and if I perish, I perish.” As I was explaining to Jerod in another thread, Acts 20:22-24 was my life’s verse. My aspiration as a Christian was to be precisely that. I still understand it, because the Bible is in no way unclear about how we ought to view ourselves. Ever.

    Part of what makes me what I am today is that god has no problem considering your life less worthy than his cause. He did it countless times in scripture, and he still does it today. We like to interpret this as god actually loving us so much that he will kill us with that love, and that’s ok, because we know how we ought to view ourselves. We also like to imagine that we are so worthless that we deserve excruciating death anyway.

    What you did was for the good of your cat, to save her life. It’s sure an honorable way to take care of the things you love.

    “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.”

    I dispute what god’s mercy means, because it actually says that we are created filthy, and ordered to be clean through the relinquishment of our will, and mental faculties. We become “bodies”.

    “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.”

    So because of the grace that we are forced to receive (or else), we should really consider our place in this man/god relationship with heaps of humility, because………..? Dunno, I am lost at that.

    When I read these things now, Michael, I see a system in which we must be willing to die for his cause, because we don’t consider our lives of value in light of the god we serve and his purposes, again, Acts… and god expects it of us.

    So at the end of the day, I don’t consider god to us operating the same as you to Miss Kitty. The relational dynamics are on different planets.

  10. Michael says:


    Your case is not incoherent…but I disagree with your narrative.
    The narrative I believe is that God’s mission is a rescue mission and all of our work in this world is an echo of that impending rescue and recovery.
    I do not believe we are called to self loathing, but Christ loving that leads to love of neighbor.
    Sacrificial love has modeled for us in Christ…I can be assured that the sacrifices will result in more than is given.
    Resurrection and restoration is worth dying for in order that we all…creation included…will live in newness of life.
    There are questions that are unanswered…for God to be God there must be more mystery than dogma.
    I believe, help my unbelief.
    In any case, you know I love you like a son and believe my God does as well.

  11. Reuben Mills says:

    I get it, I was there.

    Off topic again, we need to chat about a visit. I have a brandy new personal vehicle that I never drive because I have a company vehicle. Perfect excuse to take a drive.

    I will send you pictures of our current litter. Kittens are pure joygasm.

  12. Em says:

    Skimming here, i admit and will reread….
    One thing to avoid is a victim mindset. We are not to seek suffering – as if by doing that we manufacture virtue. That isn’t sensible and God is always sensible even when beyond our understanding. So much of our confusion is in forgetting that this is a drama, a war, which will justify God and prove Satan’s depravity. I truly believe that man (generic) was created for a purpose. Set before us is good and evil. That which we choose plays out the consequences of the two. Not Lutheran doctrine i guess, but then i am not a Lutheran. ?

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